Self-Love, Junkies and Actions

The distance between dreams and reality is called action.

I’m a self-professed junkie. A self-help junkie and I need help overcoming this self-help obsession…agh…it even confuses me as I try to write it out – how very oxymoronic – I need help with my self-help fixation…

My shelves are overflowing with various self-help books from business to wellness to self-love. A sucker for new books and perspectives, I tend to get blindsided by all the talk and as a result, I prolifically highlight my way through the book, just as I’ve allowed myself to be blindsided by charm…

Not any longer!

In the past, these books would’ve just collected dust amongst all my other books, you know the ones I’m supposed to be reading for pleasure (this reminds me I have to read a book soon before I go to the play version in a few weeks), however, slowly but surely, I’m getting through them all AND irrespective of what the skeptics might think, some have actually added a considerable amount of value to my life.

What I’ve learnt is that it’s all well and good reading this stuff from these so-called self-help gurus, watching TED Talks and listening to podcasts…sometimes words just aren’t enough.

Someone brushed off my views on the self-help industry. I was told it’s all common sense. I disagree, but that’s a debate for another time, because if it were just common sense as it was put, we’d all be acting in a respectful and loving non-erratic way, which I can assure you is not happening.

Every human is flawed in some way or other – some just don’t want to admit it, and therefore such books and coaches would be a waste. You could spend all the money in the world trying to fix yourself, but unless you recognise your own flaws and issues then nothing will ever work – EVER!

Transformation comes from recognition, and from there comes action…and this is how I’ve changed!

We can all contemplate our problems (FFS I used to do this all the time) and feel pathetically sorry for ourselves OR we can man up and take action. I’ve started to take action, which I’ve found strangely liberating and empowering.

We’re only into the second month of 2017 and action is the hot topic in my life.

Most of what I’ve done has been hugely positive – big and exciting changes will soon follow. Some actions have been a total fuck up, but I’m willing to take the bad with the good as long as the good is going to outweigh the shit, which thankfully it looks to be doing – long may this continue.

The thing is, many of these self-help coaches blow their own trumpets when it comes to their self-help book success, which is fine, however I’m a believer that this success should never be measured in sales, it should be measured in the action taken, which of course is impossible to measure.

Before I used to highlight and copy down passages I liked. It was like I was a person of religion, habitually highlighting Bible passages I found relatable. Those bright yellow passages were useless, because they were simply just words on a page that I’d decided to meticulously accentuate.

Did I refer back to them?


They just stayed there, highlighted, hanging out with all the other passages and quotes I’d done the same to over the years. I’d collected them like a person collects sexual trophies and conquests – classy!

I’m enjoying the process of self-discovery, and since I’ve started taking more note of what I read, I’ve also found the courage to take action.

Only a very few are privy to what’s going on at the moment and what the future holds, but positive changes are about to materialise and this is not because of my common-sense, it’s because I’ve followed advice as to how to go about it – I’m no longer afraid.

I’m flawed, but I’ve also developed the power within to make these changes.

I no longer mull and I certainly no longer cry over broken promises and dreams – as soon as a boat sails, it’s gone!

I’ve got bigger and better things to achieve in this world!

I know I’ve got this, and I can’t wait to see myself flourish even more, leaving those who ever doubted me far behind.

I’m not afraid to say I read self-help books, not at all – that’s my prerogative. In fact, I’d probably reach out to a life-coach if money permitted, because again, sometimes a girl just needs a bit of guidance to ensure she’s not going to fall off the wagon and make some potentially damaging decisions yet again!

Here are some of my self-help book picks of the moment and what I’ve learnt:

Spirit Junkie by Gabrielle Bernstein

Similar to my story, Gabrielle Bernstein, a once party loving diva transformed her life. Using unconventional methods and techniques, I’ve learnt how to overcome some of my fears to create a life and future that I’m super excited about. Over the last few days alone, things have been happening quickly in all aspects of my life.

One of the greatest things I’ve learnt from Bernstein’s Spirit Junkie is that sometimes you’ve just got to have faith – if I believe enough, the universe is going to meet me half way. I can’t do everything. My job is to work on all my actions that are aligned with love and abundance, and no matter what I’ll eventually be rewarded.

I also learnt about my pure potential. It sounds all new-agey, and I can assure you it’s not. I can create anything I want, whether it’s a physical or intangible thing. It’s powerful stuff, and in the last two days, I’ve managed to create something that’s about to shape and shift my destiny.

The Fire-Starting Sessions by Dannielle LaPorte

Whoa, with plans to do my MBA soon, I’ve been filling my shelves with many Marketing and Business Leadership books, but The Fire-Starting Sessions gives me my fixes in both mindfulness and business leadership – I love it – it’s helped me define what I consider to be success.

The Fire-Starting Sessions is an actionable self-help book and it works on the premise that ideas are only really valuable if they’re applied, and boy have I realised this!

I’m taking action, and this is how I’m moving forward – this is how we all move forward. Yeah perhaps we’ll screw up along the way and make some God awful choices, but that’s fine, next time I’ll readjust my actions and realign my love so I don’t make the same mistakes yet again!

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