From the moment we started talking I knew I wanted you around!
I’m having a serious Carrie moment. Here I am sitting at my desk, tapping away at the keys with some epic scenery to inspire (although mine’s the Yorkshire hills and not the NYC cityscape), pondering love, but not just any old love, love at first sight!
Ah, love at first sight – it’s what fairytales and any kind of chick flick are made of. Two strangers come face to face for the first time, only to become 100% taken by each other, or at least one with the other.
The romantic in me believes in love at first sight…I have friends who’re currently dating and have even married from this so-called love at first sight phenomenon, so do I believe?
Yes, yes I do!
Why the topic?
Good question! Well, I guess the first reason is a conversation I had with a friend a few weeks ago. We were like the Conservatives vs. Labour – one was for the notion of love at first sight while the other wasn’t! You can guess which side I was gunning for!
It got me thinking – is there such a thing as true love from day one? I couldn’t find any answer to counter it! Why not? Why can’t a 5-hour meeting for the first time with a guy make you fall head over heels in love?
I’m not a realist at all – in fact, I’m far far from it! I love the idea of being introduced to a guy, locking eyes, engaging in conversation, and knowing he’s the one…
My friend was horrified! “How could you possibly fall in love at first sight when you don’t even know their name?”
“I’d make sure I’d find out his name, of course!” I replied with a wink and a smile. She couldn’t quite tell if I was being serious or whether it was all tongue in cheek. To be honest, I didn’t quite know myself.
Of course I don’t have a real answer for her and she wasn’t quite satisfied with my nonchalant shoulder shrug and sarcasm.
She argued ‘lust’ while I argued ‘love’. She even went as far as saying I had idealisations of love…perhaps I do, but is there anything wrong with that? I guess I’m more like Carrie Bradshaw than I thought – a dreamer…
There’s got to be a subconscious connection – there’s got to be something in the brain that triggers you to ‘fall in love at first sight’ or to at least make you think it. Yeah, there’s the so-called ‘halo effect‘ that psychologists often talk about, where stereotypes kick in and you associate attractiveness with goodness. This might be partially true, but I don’t think anyone’s that shallow to fall in love at first sight just over a person’s looks…love is more than looks – it’s deeper than that – any normal person with an ounce of integrity knows this already.
When a conversation with a guy happens and you discover how much you have in common…something clicks. When you meet a guy who reminds you of a person you once loved or someone who’s really special to you…something clicks. When a guy stirs up memories and ignites a sense of nostalgia of some sort…something clicks. Or when he reminds you of another person, who in some way has had a positive impact on you or your life…again, something clicks! And don’t even get me started on eye contact – it’s how souls catch on fire!
You may think it’s impossible, the thought of it may make you roll your eyes, and you probably think I’m a little stupid and naive, but until you experience it yourself, you just never know, trust me! You see, I’m also the type of person who can’t be hemmed in by all those rules, rules and beliefs like ‘love at first sight can’t exist’ – I’m the type of girl who just goes with my emotions (dangerous, I know)!
Butterflies, craving their attention, all of a sudden your ‘boyfriend type’ disappears, they’re always on your mind, logic goes out the window, picturing a life of adventure and fun, the desire to know everything about him…
Obviously, there’s a massive difference between needing a person and loving them. The need for companionship and nurturing is very different – this is not love at first sight; it’s what I’d refer to as filling a void.
Maybe I’m wrong, but like I told my friend I believe in love at first sight, and I want to believe in it, but that’s just me…the romanticist! Enough said, I’m going to follow my gut instinct!
What do you think? Is love at first sight possible? (Please say “yes” ;))